Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
