I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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