What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
