I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
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