We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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