Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Randomize
