come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
