Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
he was CRYING into my vagina
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
