You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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