One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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