Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Do you have feelings for this penis?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
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