yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
