even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
