i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Randomize
