I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
my liver is dry heaving
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
