Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize