What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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