Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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