Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
