You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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