So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize