I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
