Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just gift wrapped bread.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
