Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
