Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I still have a little drunk in my system
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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