I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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