Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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