So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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