singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
