Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
