He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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