These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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