He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
