I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
where are my eyebrows?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
