but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize
