Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
