"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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