my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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