No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
