Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
