Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
