i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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