btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
