He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
