How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
