My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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