I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
