This girl is more easily done than said...
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
Randomize
