why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize