i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
